I’m in Love with a Belt

Monitaly has a belt, this belt, I want this belt real bad. I love how long this belt is, I love how shiny it is. I want to marry this belt and have its babies. I want to fall asleep caressing its supple bridle leather. I want to wear this belt with shorts for no reason other than it would be fucking stupid. I want to walk down the street and give people in that stupid Gucci belt a look that says “you absolute fucking neophyte, my belt might cost a few hundred less than yours but it’s made my Amish craftsman, enjoy your entry level conspicuous consumption, I have ascended.”

Sadly, this belt is out of stock and I currently can’t be bothered to proxy one from Japan at a mark-up.

Edit: Since originally writing this it has come back in stock, please don’t buy one because I need it more than you do.

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